Caution required on friendly loan.

A K Rao

Active member
There is a saving in Hindi about the friendship and loan. It says that loan or lending money to a friend is like cutting the friendship with a pair of scissors. By lending the money to a friend we can't become strict while asking to return it and many times we desperately need money and we don't get it from others or from the person who has borrowed from us. This leaves one in frustration. So the best thing is to avoid loans amongst the friend after discussing the reasons frankly among them!
 

arunima25

Verified member
Normally, I am not in a habit of getting a loan from a friend or lending o a friend. When money is involved the relationship will sour. I don't want the money to come between friends. having said that I have lent money to some of my friends and also burrowed from a few friends. When I burrowed and lent, we had a clear agreement on the terms of repayment.
That's a very good thing to make a clear agreement. And if one is going for a big amount, it is even better to go for an authentic legal agreement.One might not feel comfortable talking about a legal agreement with loved ones. But trust me it would the right thing to do and to save the relationship in future. Better to go firm, polite and clear on terms.
 

Yugocean

Valued Contributor
A friend asked for the money, but this time too I was alert and with the help of other companions, asked about his need. Then we found that he didn't have any special needs, he just wanted to stay in a hotel in his in-law's town. He was advised to stay at his in-law's house, as there is no need to spend all the time, he has to live with the one he is visiting.
 

Mika

VIP Contributor
Normally, I am not in a habit of getting a loan from a friend or lending o a friend. When money is involved the relationship will sour. I don't want the money to come between friends. having said that I have lent money to some of my friends and also burrowed from a few friends. When I burrowed and lent, we had a clear agreement on the terms of repayment.
 

Yugocean

Valued Contributor
@arunima25 Great, this is the true social support, your husband is doing real social work. My father also helped poor candidates doing competitive exams and never took any money from them.

@AKRao Again that friend asked for money, but I was only ready to help with requirement. He is good, but should also understand.

@Alexandoy @Josemendez @Augusta
When you lend money, it is sole your responsibility, so never falling a victim to good for nothing relatives/friends is better.



 

Augusta

VIP Contributor
This has always been the issue people have and have people away from borrowing money out these days. My own family member is owing some good amount of money for over 2 years now. Something that would have taken few months. So even family and friends can’t be trusted with loan
 

Josemendez

Verified member
The fact is that one need to be careful while dealing with anything that concerns money. This is because people are not to be trusted and can turn around and hunt you who lend them the money.
I believe that while lending someone a huge amount of money which I can give out freely , there is going to be a legal backing to it.
 

Sherman198

VIP Contributor
It's very hard to condone and accept, when you borrow someone money and they fail to return the money, it's very hard to take. You get to think that you are being taken for a ride, it's always painful. That's why I don't engage in borrowing people money, if they ask for my help, if the money is really big, I just dash them any amount I can afford.
 

Alexandoy

VIP Contributor
I am a generous person but I have learned the bitter lesson of lending money to friends and relatives. I was abused that some of them borrow money just to take advantage of me. They are mostly gone because they have been avoiding me. Clearly they have no intention to pay. Now my policy is to never lend money to anyone.
 

Yugocean

Valued Contributor
People keep needing money for various reasons and sometimes they have to ask for a loan from their friend /relative, because it can be returned at the time of mutual agreement without interest thereon. However, the cunningness of some people has questioned its credibility.

There are some people who take loan and do not return it, due to this people's trust in each other about money is decreasing and friendship loans are now ending. This has happened to me myself, when a sly person borrowed both crypto and fiat from me and never returned it, experience has kept me alert.

Recently a handicapped friend of mine told me that some sly people took money by winning his trust, and at a time when he is in dire need of money, the borrowers are avoiding him by talking about returning all the money later.

Other friends and I found out that that handicapped friend really needed money, then I explained to him not to give money to anyone, and we brought him the necessary things after knowing his need, so that he would know that money should not be given directly for every need.

Do you have any idea or experience in Friendly Loan?​
 

arunima25

Verified member
@Bookwormlux
Experience teaches us many things, and this is one. Never cross the affordable limit.

@arunima25
This happens when we help honest people and not those who just want to use our trust; such honesty keeps both sides with each other in time of crises. However, when someone's character is not good (like the drunkyard), then better top avoid helping him.
We have learnt it through our experience that we should just ignore and avoid such spineless people around us. They are actually parasites.
My husband keeps lending money as a charity to needy students who come from a poor background but are very talented. It was touching that one student after few years gave us a cheque with interest on the money that we gave him. My husband refused to take it. He asked us to take it and sponsor two more students like him.
 

sincerem

VIP Contributor
Their are some friends who act in a cunning way, they aren't just concerned about the friendship welfare just achieving money from us all the time. When we are in such situation we should better cut off such friendship cos when the money we're offering them finishes they won't be around, they're simply driven by the money we offer them. While real friends takes loan, and repay it on time in order to preserve the trust.
 

Abigael

Valued Contributor
Giving your friend such a loan can really cause problems to your friendship. Especially if it is a large amount of money and they fail to pay it back. That is why I don't take huge loans from friends and relatives, and I don't also give out huge loans. Just a small amount is good because most of them are able to pay it back.
 

Mika

VIP Contributor
I have never been in a situation like this one or seen such a thing happening in my close circle of friends and family but I have heard of numerous similar stories where someone used the trust bestowed upon him to scam this guy. I wouldn't say you should not help your friend, what I mean is you should check whether he actually needs money or not
 

btaliat

VIP Contributor
Most times my friends do take the advantage of the fact that I don't know ask for money borrowed. So they intentionally borrow money from me with the aim of not repaying since they know I am bad at asking for money. Now I have devices a means, I will either borrow what literally I can even dash out or I pretend not it have money. And ever since then, the loss has been minimized.
 

Yugocean

Valued Contributor
@Bookwormlux
Experience teaches us many things, and this is one. Never cross the affordable limit.

@arunima25
This happens when we help honest people and not those who just want to use our trust; such honesty keeps both sides with each other in time of crises. However, when someone's character is not good (like the drunkyard), then better top avoid helping him.
 

arunima25

Verified member
I have heard many stories of this sort and just avoid lending money to friends or borrowing it. My husband lended money to his close friend and he returned it in time. There was no hassle there. He had similar experience with few in his close friends and they returned it in time or rather before time. But one of his cousin played a victim card of being in crisis and took some money. It's been more than ten years and he has not returned a single penny. He is addicted to alcohol and is a bankrupt now due to his addiction. Glad that the money was not a huge amount. Anyway he has lost our trust and we don't entertain him anymore. Money matters can ruin relationships.
 

Bookwormlux

Valued Contributor
Due to bad experience about this issue of friendly loan, I have resolved to only help friends with money when I have and am ready to do so, but I won't give loans to anyone. People lie to get loans and they would never return the money at all.
Just before end of my exams, a friend asked me to give him money to buy kerosene to refill his cooking stove, that he's going to repay, but he didn't pay till we left school.
I will only give out money I can afford to lose.
 
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